putting it all in perspective

after a long, pretty much sleepless night with both kids (one more so than the other), my first inclination is to feel like it's not fair that i've had three nights with no sleep in the last 10 days. then i remember that it could be worse. the fact that madison was stuffy and boogery and refused to sleep until about 3.30 this morning and that cole was awake between 3 and 4 and i got about 2 hours of sleep before they were back up and ready for the day is small beans compared to what others are facing. yes, i'm thinking of someone in particular... a precious little boy named stellan and his mommy, daddy, big brothers and big sister. i'm sure a few of you who read this blog are also readers of mckmama's blog and are familiar with what's going on with this family. if not, i urge you to check it out- we have two links to them, one being the button that says "praying for stellan" on it. normally, i don't really get too involved in things like this, when i don't personally know the family, but this time, the mommy in me says that this family needs all the thoughts and prayers they can get. seeing them experience something so difficult makes my "difficulties" seem rather petty. i'm so lucky to have happy, healthy kids...

sometimes i'm really ashamed of myself.

what a week.

the majority of my week, as usual, has involved the two munchkins... the loves of our lives! which brings me to a random but valid tidbit: i have over 600 photos from this month alone, and the month isn't over yet. i start a new folder for each month and (try to) burn them onto cd's when the month is done. it occurred to me, as i stared at the magnificent photo count, that i am an out-of-control shutterbug. BUT in my defense, i have preserved countless moments. we will never again experience those same moments, so maybe it's not so bad after all. or maybe i'm trying to make an excuse for myself. whatever... on to the rest of the week!we had some sibling love... notice the bus in cole's hand? he was such a good boy during our run to fleet farm at the beginning of the week that he got a bus for his very own. we plan on getting him a fisher-price little people bus for his birthday, but he doesn't know that, and this will hold him over till then.

mischief or annoyance? you decide...

madison LOVES squash and sweet potatoes! seriously, she can't get enough! beans and bananas are still a no-go, but she likes a little unsweetened applesauce now and then.

this was her bath tonight- first time in the big tub! she has been able to stand while holding onto things for short amounts of time (like, less than a minute, usually), and it just looks so funny when she does it! it's strange to see such a petite little person standing...

she claimed one of cole's old spoons and refused to let go for her bath. fine with me... she's been chewing on things a LOT, so i'm guessing she's teething. or at the very least, starting to.

cole helped madi with her bath... he ate his snack. don't ask me how that helped, but he thought he was big stuff, eating his cracker next to the tub.

FINALLY, some smiles! all clean, with mommy and daddy all to herself.

teething tablet, anyone?!

yes, our week has been interesting. cole learned some new words: hemi, truck (he just says "ck", but we get the picture) and i forgot to mention before that he also says hat. it sounds a lot like "hot". he's also very detail-oriented: when we read "goodnight moon" before bed, he picks out things, like the kitties, the ball of yarn, things like that- he names them. he also points to the step on the pages with the toy house and says "updown, updown, updown", his term for stairs. and, for anyone that is familiar with the book, there's a bookcase on some of the pages. it has stuffed animals on them, the drawings are pretty tiny... but he points to the one on the top shelf that looks like a sock monkey and says "george" (like curious george). smarty.

so obviously, we've had another joyous (and sometimes frustrating) week with the wee ones that run our house, but we've also experienced a great loss. most of you who know us and know the people in the area also know that a few days ago, a wonderful man was taken in a car accident. he was in our sunday meeting for the past 3 years or so... a big-hearted man who we will all miss terribly. i have to say, i'm a little hesitant to go to meeting tomorrow because i don't personally feel ready to not see him there. i didn't know him as well as others but he still meant a lot to us. his funeral was today and kelvin was a pallbearer. at the burial, all the women from our meeting we given a single red rose... i think that's touched me more deeply than anything else in this whole experience. our thoughts are with his family for the days that lie ahead; it's a comfort to know that we can find peace and joy even in such sorrow. and on a personal note, i think that kelvin and i will always hold dear the last memory we have of him: we sat next to steve last sunday at gospel meeting and he spent a good part of that time playing with madison, who was smiling and "talking" to him. it melts my heart to think of it...

snzxxxx.

that would be the sound of me, snoring. while awake and partially functioning, of course.

see photo below for the cause of this...

thaaaaat's right.

another sleepless night.

it started off great

then it went sour.

yeah.

think: to bed (meaning finally asleep) around 9'ish (bedtime routine is usually in full-swing around 8), then awake and talking to himself at about 2 am. i'm sure he was awake long before that... my guess is that he dozed for an hour or so after he drifted off. the whole ordeal ended around 5 am, after a few hours of me on the floor by his bed. i got to thinking, trying to muddle through the unorganized mess of thoughts in my head (made even more unintelligible from lack of sleep), that maybe he's become sensitive to dairy. last week friday, when he never even went to sleep until about 3.30 am the next morning, he'd had a lot of milk and some yogurt. on saturday he had mostly watered-down juice because we were out and about. he had a few bites of a cheese sandwich for lunch, some homemade cheese pizza for supper and a few bites of ice-cream, but it didn't affect him that night. he had some grilled cheese sandwiches over the past few days and annie's natural shells and white cheddar, but the only thing i can think of is that if he takes in too much dairy, it causes insomnia. i found a little something on a mommy forum about dairy sensitivities causing poor sleep patterns in kids (toddlers too), and some of the cases sounded EXACTLY like cole's. other than that, all i found was add or adhd as a cause of toddler insomnia, and i really doubt that's the case, since he's pretty normal in every other aspect. i don't know- does anyone have any thoughts on this? if anyone has any input, ideas, experiences, what have you (anything!!!), please let me know!

*thanks in advance!*

6 months!!

madison had her 6-month well-baby visit today...here are her stats:

13 pounds, 7 ounces (8th percentile)

26 1/4 inches (79th percentile)

17 in. head circumference (35th percentile)

weight-for-length: about the 1st percentile

dr h made the nurse weigh her a second time, because he didn't think her first weighing had been recorded right. it was... she actually lost 6 ounces since her 4-month visit. because she's on-track with her other development (motor skills, etc), i'm guessing her weight loss is due to her increased activity. i was instructed to really push the solids and supplement with formula if we have to, to encourage madison to gain weight. she tried bananas yesterday and HATED them! i'm thinking squash or beans, then trying a little fruit again.

but... as long as madi's happy, healthy and developing like she should be, i'm not going to get too worried over it. sure, there's a bit of panic lurking in the back of my mind (ok, the front of my mind), but if dr h isn't overly concerned, i guess i shouldn't stress myself to pieces over it. right?

fishing and vocab

on saturday we went up to stevens point to go fishing with kelvin's family- his parents, kandace, duey, uncle randy and aunt karen. it was cloudy and a bit chilly, but that didn't seem to matter much! i was geared up for a day of screaming and tantrums from cole... we did the normal bedtime routine on friday night, but he didn't fall asleep till a little after 3.30 am saturday. don't ask me why- he wasn't crying or anything, just wide awake. cole immediately designated himself co-captain. as soon as randy started the boat, cole was climbing on his lap to steer... i think that was the highlight of cole's day!

madison just chewed on stuff.

cole's little disney cars pole that daddy picked out for him to match his life jacket... every time someone casted their line out into the water, cole would screech and holler "uh oh!". funny!
and for the record, the pole stayed with us for at least an hour... shortly after i snapped this photo, cole dropped it into the water. "uh oh".
*why don't they make kids' poles to float when they're dropped into the water?*

after the lake and lunch, cole was getting a bit tired and uncooperative, so we headed home. we decided that since we were close, we'd swing by mom and dad's to see this snap-on mini chopper that dad had gotten as a raffle prize for his customers. we ended up staying for supper... cole immediately went to the playhouse and found the old doll stroller from when us kids were younger. we discovered that miss squish is petite enough to sit in it, so cole had a blast giving her a ride! of course, they were well-supervised...

out of curiosity this evening, i decided to jot down all the words that cole knows (as in, says, not just understands). we came up with the following list:

cole, mommy, daddy, madison, grandpa ("papa"), sarah, george, corn, house, moon, banana, up, down, on, off, cheese, apple, hot, no, bum, peepee, owie, baby, car, bus, kitty, hand, uh-oh, please, cow, bath, hi, bye-bye, eye, happy, ball, woah, see, all done, run, pop, bubble, color, wow, and poo. if i got them all, that's 45, 46 if you count "all done" as two words. he knows some signs, too, like milk, eat, more, i love you, thank you, please, love... the kid has a nice vocabulary indeed. it's funny to ride in the van now- all the way to gospel mtg this afternoon, we heard "corn. corn, house, corn. sarah. house, corn. corn. bye-bye. corn. george. house. house. house. sarah."... you get the idea. pretty cute!

as for madison, well, she's trying new things too- she hates bananas. really dislikes them. and her 6-month well-baby visit is tomorrow, so we'll post her stats later.

on a side note--- does anyone have any tips for getting rid of ants? we have those teeny tiny ones, just in the living room, for some reason. we need something that is effective but is safe if the kids were to get ahold of it. i tried a chalk line, since i've heard many times that ants won't cross chalk, but i guess these little guys have boots or something. chalk doesn't seem to bother them much...

*i found a suggestion online: mix together 1/4 c sugar, 1/2 c molasses (i used syrup because we don't have molasses) and 1/4 c baking yeast. spread the paste onto index cards and place in ant-infested areas. this particular hint popped up several times in my quick search, so i mixed some up, spread a little onto three index cards and within the last 5 minutes, all three cards have caught and trapped quite a few ants. the sugar attracts the ants, the molasses (or syrup) traps them and the yeast absorbs their body fluids, so essentially, it's a trap and dehydrate deal. cool... totally safe, non-toxic, so far it seems effective... we'll see what the traps look like in the morning!

to my brilliant children:

i love you! you never cease to amaze me, even in the little things... like this morning, for example. it was a bombardment of new things- madison, you got yourself into a sitting position from your hands and knees; cole, you turned the light off all by yourself before heading downstairs. you pointed to the picture of plaza san marco that's hanging in the dining room and said "house"; your new thing is to yell "ruuunnnnn!" at the top of your lungs as you go streaking through the house. madi, my sweet little girl- you've taught yourself peek-a-boo. literally.
sure, these things may not be a big deal to anyone else, but because you are our miracles, everything you do is amazing. sometimes you frustrate me beyond tears but at the end of each and every day, i know i'm blessed to be your mommy...
i love you!!

the bonita story...

upon the mention of the "bonita story" and the request of someone to hear it, i'll indulge. several probably already know it, but bear with me.

the story starts around the time we were married, really, because that's where our quest to begin a family commenced. after a miscarriage in august of '02, a surgery (ovarian cysts) followed by a dose of lupron and the warnings that if we didn't conceive within the first three months after the lupron our chances were about nil, another miscarriage in october 'o5, we pretty much gave up. it seemed that we just weren't meant to have our own... and we didn't have the finances to do in vitro or adopt. so we put it on the back burner... besides, i was busy working in a group home, putting in 7-8 shifts every monday through friday for months on end.

winter special meeting visits rolled around in mid-december '06, and we were to have bonita for supper one night. i'd been practically drooling all day over the thought of the lasagna, garlic bread and salad i'd planned for supper, but when it came time to eat, well, my appetite disappeared. actually, i felt kind of queasy, but given my work schedule and the fact that intestinal viruses are abundant around the holidays, i figured i was either over-tired or getting sick. i was fairly certain it wasn't a virus so i blamed it on working too many hours. bonita, however, put the "p" word out on the table. we were pretty quick to say that couldn't be it, given our history, but this little smirk (for lack of a better term) kept showing itself on her face. our visit was done, it was the holidays, i was working endless hours and my sister's wedding was approaching and the whole thing was quickly forgotten. elissa and logan's lovely wedding came and went and the weekend after, out of curiosity (but with no hopes held high), i bought a $1 pregnancy test from dollar general. i laughed at myself, thinking that i was just wasting my time and money, but i got the shock of my life when it read positive! of course, it was only a matter of days before i had to sheepishly explain to bonita that she, in fact, had been correct. she'd had faith in that little miracle (who is now our energetic, funny, frustrating and loveable little boy) before we had... and when cole was born, she was there to visit us. of course, cole doesn't know the story, and couldn't understand it even if we did tell him, but he seems to have a connection with bonita... the only explanation i have for it is that it started before we even knew he existed. someday, he'll know the story!

he loves bonita...

and her shoes.

lesson not learned!

you'd think that after several weeks of procrastinating with posting and then having huge long posts to catch up, i'd get the picture but apparently, i don't. oh well. in my defense, we HAVE been a bit busy... and next week tuesday? i'm dreading it already. dentist appointments, biolife appointment, swimming lessons... all between 2 and 6 pm. yay. back on track: mom and sarah watched the kids last week friday while i had my occupational therapy session. it was short, so i got back home before lunch was over. cole and sarah were goofing around with sarah's chapstick- he'd push it into her mouth (sometimes a little too far) and sarah would pop it back out. he thought it was the bee's knees, i guess!

and madison hung onto grandma... her eyes really popped out in this photo!

thursday night we had bonita and jennifer for supper and a little visit. we really really enjoyed it, and cole was SO upset when they had to leave; he cried (screamed) and clung to bonita. i thought for sure either she would have to stay or cole would have to go with her... guess there really is a bond between the two! it started before we knew we were pregnant with him... if you don't know the story, i'd be happy to indulge you!

saturday morning story, as narrated by daddy.

(the sundress that madison's wearing? daddy picked it out and brought it home out of the blue... )

she looks intrigued but i can tell you that that's not the case. what she's REALLY thinking is how to get that whole cardboard page in her mouth...

just can NOT wait for her cereal!

last night i was taking photos of cole because he was just being cute, and he started getting up REALLY close to the lens, making faces into it... he even kissed it! usually i'm a bit anal and hypersensitive about the kids handling the camera, but all i could do was laugh... and snap away!

thanks to mckmama (see the link on the right), i've decided to endeavor potty training with cole. friday night i found him a package of "wife-beaters" (sorry, i don't really care for the term either but most people have no clue when you say undershirt...) and there were some cute little briefs, so i thought ahead and got a three-pack. i mean, he'll eventually need them, right? we're going to gently attempt this, and if he starts getting frustrated with the whole thing, we'll stop... but some kids catch on really quick. it's worth a try, i guess. if he's not ready, we'll know, and we'll wait till he is. ANYHOO... after putting plastic garbage bags over the living room furniture cushions and spare sheets on top of the plastic, it was time for cole to try his new undies! he stayed dry for about two hours... just as i was bragging him up to elissa, he came running out of the kitchen, leaving a small series of wet footprints. whups. so we had the opportunity to show cole what it looks like when he goes potty on the floor, and made a learning experience out of it (no punishment of course).

he climbs on everything... and learned today that it's not as comfortable to scoot off the table (while on your belly) with undies on as it is with a diaper on. ouch. he looked more in a state of confusion than pain, but he didn't try it again!

i do apologize for the lengthy post... there's just so much that we've been doing and not enough time to download all my photos because i take WAY too many and then there's the whole find-time-to-write-an-entire-post-at-a-decent-hour issue. yup, mama's fallin' behind here! eh, someday we'll get caught up. ha! in the meantime, my falling-behind self is really loving being a mommy. see, i can easily say that because at this precise moment, both kids are fast asleep upstairs. no, really- even though my son has been a real challenge lately, i love it. there's nothing better!

hey, y'all!!

so in case you missed it, i put a "traffic" ticker on our blog... we are always hearing from people about this thing or that that they've seen on our posts, so i thought it would be fun to see who all stops in. unfortunately, i have no idea WHO is popping in, only where you're from. i feel like you all know us so well just from reading about our daily chaos and random adventures, but don't really know who you are. i'd like to change that... i'd love to know who you are, how you found us, where you're from, etc.! for example, hello to iron mountain, mi., huntingburg, in., and places from our state like eland, shawano, rosendale, osseo... i think i MIGHT know who some of you are, but i don't know for sure. feel free to drop a comment, letting me know who you are, maybe where you're from, how you found us, whatever. you're welcome to pop on in anytime (of course) and we'd love to hear from you! :)

hoooo, boy....!!

no words needed... :)

squish's new activity... munching on her paci in very odd ways!

i couldn't resist! after a very strange and obviously painful mess in his diaper, we resorted to sticking cole in the tub to wash him off since the wipes were useless (not a sticky mess... it was literally like sand. smelly sand. no wipe can touch that!!). since his little bum was pretty sore and he'd gone potty in the tub, we figured it was safe to let him streak for a little while. he loved it! i'm thinking that maybe this whole incident is related to teething? he's got a nice case of diaper rash going on, which is something he's had mildly, and twice at the very most. poor baby!!

and what is our little sweetpea looking so happy about?

yup... hands and knees, baby! she was doing this yesterday and a little the day before. she's not even five months yet! mommy is so very proud of her, but thinks she's growing a little too fast! it won't be long and we'll have mobility, i think.

4th of july

friday night kelvin and i went out for dinner for our anniversary (we hit up o'charley's.... yummm!) while my mom and sarah watched the kids. it was SO nice to get out of the house and have a quiet meal- thanks again, mom and sarah!

after we got home and mom and sarah left, the fireworks started here in clintonville. we weren't really planning on watching them, but after a few good booms (i swear i heard plaster crumbling from inside our bedroom walls... and what's up with kids who can't take a decent nap during the day but can sleep through the fireworks being lit off a few blocks from the house?? i don't get it...) i remembered that my camera has a 'fireworks' setting and i've never tried it. i got a few shots but haven't edited them yet...

the parade in manawa was saturday so we checked it out before heading up to mom and dad's for some relaxation/run-around-outside time.

this was the best part... and it wasn't even part of the parade! some guy parked illegally (legal every other day of the year); there were signs on every lightpost up and down main st that said "no parking, violators will be towed". the funny thing is, this guy parked RIGHT NEXT TO one of thos signs! he got ticketed and then the tow truck came... he and his lady friend tried to talk the cop out of it, but the damage was done. they drove away but still got stuck with the ticket and towing charge.

miss madison, in her stars and stripes!!

playground

yesterday afternoon i took the kids to the playground. it wasn't raining and cole needed some serious distraction... think: overly cranky/sensitive, 50 minute nap, teething. yeah. it's been a real party here. so, we needed to mix things up a little, have a change of pace. the playground at the elementary school is way better than the park, and i thought that because it's summer, it would be ok to play on it. i'd been mulling it over for a day or two, because i wasn't sure. i mean, it IS a public school and we DO pay taxes on it so really, we should be able to use it. on the other hand, what if we were busted for trespassing because it's not a park? my taxpayer's thinking won out and off we went- and found that someone else had the same idea. apparently i was worried over nothing. and cole had fun!

he climbed the big slide. he climbed up. he climbed down. up. down. up. down. (notice he didn't slide? he seems to be a little wary of sliding, even on the tiny ones... but stairs he likes. good cardio!)

he rode the firetruck (one of those spring-based contraptions)... and yes, that's a small tear on his cheek. about 5 minutes before the firetruck, he decided to try jumping off the play equipment because he saw some other kids doing it. i was finding madison's pacifier and he was safely busy when i turned away (i was 2 feet away). all of a sudden i heard a whoosh and a thud... and cole laying sprawled on his back. he got the wind knocked out of him but that was it, thankfully. i think it scared him enough that he won't be trying it again. i hope.

miss madi got a turn in the tunnel!
(she thought it was pretty neat- and yes, she's sitting by herself. she started that around the time she turned 5 months...)

i LOVE this one- sheer and utter joy, excitement, happiness... the face of a kid being a kid.

miss huge eyes... feel free to click on the photo to enlarge it for even more big eyes!

since kelvin has off today, if it doesn't rain, maybe we'll hit the playground again. oh, and i have to mention that my wonderful son walked almost all the way back instead of riding in the stroller- he "helped" push madison. i was amazed, because he's got an attention span of a goldfish (what is it- three seconds?) when he's outside, but he was cooperative 2 1/2 of the 3 blocks we walked. sometimes he really amazes me...

catching up. again.

i thought i'd be able to get a 'catch up' post in with plenty of time to spare... but for some reason, my wonderfully brilliant son has taken to speed-napping lately. yah- not that great. it doesn't give me much time to get anything done and by the time he's been up for 45 minutes, he's ready for another nap. that's how our days have been going recently...cole and grandma reading a book...

the matching game i made for cole that posed absolutely no challenge for him. mommy certainly was silly to think that cole needed practice matching shapes...!

i couldn't resist- i've never had the chance to use the candlelight mode on my camera, so when cole decided to play with the nightlight yesterday, i had to try it. i thought it turned out kind of neat!

madi and daddi (it rhymes so i feel like spelling it that way...)

cole went with grandma to the glendale farms yesterday to pick up some strawberries. she told me about the face he made the first time he tried one... apparently he didn't remember what they tasted like, so when he grabbed one out of the fridge today, i grabbed the camera.

yup- same face (i imagine)!

i think it's time to either find a second crib or get cole a twin bed with a bedrail... madison's too squirmy (this morning i found her on her elbows and knees) for the bassinette in the pack-n-play. so, now that she's no longer up a little higher off the ground, we're finding a new set of challenges to deal with. like, how to keep cole from poking at her through the mesh, setting her all the way down (that's a long ways to bend down!) without waking her up at night... once again, off i go to scour craigslist for a crib or bed. at this point i don't really care- if cole can climb in and out of his crib with the toddler rails, he can get in and out of a twin bed, no problem. of course, if we got a real bed we'd have to get a nice long bedrail for it... a toddler bed would be nice, but i'm not sure that it's the most practical. he'll outgrow it in a few short years. anyway, i am keeping my eye open and crossing my fingers that we don't have too many issues before we find something!!

random thoughts and stuff

• some of you may want to strangle me, but here's my opinion on the whole michael jackson hoopla: a plastic man will never replace elvis as king. end of story.
• so i lied- that's my one random, coherent thought. the rest have been squelched by mommyhood, exhaustion and the like. but i do know that they were half-way witty, before they spiraled into oblivion. i need to write things down...
• i am craving real food. the way i see it, i've lost only 7 pounds (nowhere near enough) and madison's cheeks are the only thing that are really affected by wheat and dairy... besides, we have our anniversary to celebrate, which means having a nice dinner out. i'm seriously reconsidering my dedication to the whole wheat/dairy-free thing...
• my son is a genius. maybe not by anyone else's standards, but i think he is. for example: i made a little matching game for him (i will post a photo) and the very first time he saw it, he matched the shapes up without any mistakes. his proud grandma will attest to that (she was there).
• enough randoms- i've run out. i promise i will post a few photos before the week is up otherwise i will hear about it for sure! (*ahem, sasa... :))